Belonging, self-esteem, and the everyday superpower of growing up between languages.
Language is more than words. It’s culture, it’s the sound of our childhood, the rhythm of family, the invisible thread that binds identity and belonging. For multilingual families raising children away from their heritage homeland, the challenge often lies not only in passing on a language—but in nurturing pride in it.
I recently had the chance to discuss with Dimitris Karagiorgas — a psychiatrist specialized in child and adolescent mental health, with a background in cognitive behavioral and art therapy — and we explored the deep connection between language, belonging, and identity. Dimitris reminded me that belonging is not just a feeling. It is a deep psychological need:
“Belonging is a harbor from which the ships of exploration set sail. It is identity, spatial and temporal anchoring, a sense of security and understanding.”
But for many migrant families, this sense of belonging is fragile. Moving to a new country can mean leaving behind not just people and places, but parts of ourselves. As Dimitris told me:
“Migration is not just the act of relocating. It is also a separation from one’s culture, habits, language, family and friends—often with an undefined end date.”
This separation, when unacknowledged or unsupported, may lead to a lingering sense of exile. Children—those “sensitive sensors of the family system,” as Karagiorgas puts it—can feel this tension, even if they cannot name it. Their identities form at the intersection of multiple worlds: school and home, local culture and ancestral memory, dominant and minority languages.
So how do we help them build pride in who they are?
1. Start with Yourself
Our children watch us closely. If we are ashamed, hesitant, or apologetic about our language and culture, they will be too. If we embrace our multilingual reality with joy, they will feel free to do the same.
Dimitris emphasizes that:
“Children show us, through the way they exist, how well we as adults are defending this condition of multilingual, multicultural life.”
2. Honor All the Worlds Your Children Inhabit
Children in multilingual families live in-between. And that’s okay. Rather than pushing them to “choose” one identity, we can celebrate the richness of their in-between-ness. Every language they speak, every culture they experience, is part of who they are.
“If the soul of a people is to be found somewhere, it is in its language.”
Let’s not ask our children to choose which soul to keep. Let them have both.
3. Create Community
“Where I participate, I live,” Karagiorgas says. Community support is key. Children—and their families—need spaces where their multilingualism is not “different,” but normal. Heritage language programs, playgroups, cultural activities, and friendships with others in similar situations help children feel seen.
4. Make Your Language Their Language
Language is not just a skill to be learned—it’s a relationship to be nurtured. When we connect it with love, humor, play, music, storytelling, emotions, memories, then it becomes meaningful. It becomes alive. It becomes theirs.
5. Accept the Complexity
Not every child will speak every language equally. That’s okay. What matters most is not “perfect fluency,” but a sense of connection. A child who feels that their language and culture are valued is more likely to embrace them, now and in the future.
A gentle reminder:
Let’s remind our children — and ourselves — that multilingualism is a superpower.
The ability to speak more than one language is a gift. A super skill.
And yes, if it helps, don’t be afraid to call them superheroes.
Because that’s what they are: cultural superheroes, navigating worlds with courage, humor, and heart.
To conclude
In the discussion I had with Dimitris, he said something that shook me:
“Whoever has held a suitcase in their hand, even once, may never feel like they fully belong again.”
It sounded so dramatic, so definite — and in a way, it struck a nerve.
But then I took those words and reflected on my life, raising multilingual children abroad, my multicultural friends, all the wonderful families I have met, juggling 2, 3, even 4 languages and the communities we’ve all built around us.
That’s when I realized: through language, love, and community, we can help our children carry that suitcase with pride. Not as a burden, but as a treasure chest — full of voices, songs, stories, and the confidence to say:
“I belong to many places, and all of them belong to me.”
And maybe that’s the beauty of it all.
“Only when you share someone else’s culture do you become richer.
It is the only kind of sharing that doesn’t make you poorer.
Usually, when you share something, you are left with less.
But when you share culture, you lose nothing.”
— Hélène Glykatzi-Ahrweiler
Chryssa Oikonomidou
Chryssa Oikonomidou is the Co-Founder of Multilingual-Families.com and Founder of Paidokipos, a creative Greek teacher, storyteller, and animator of interactive educational theater events. With a background as Senior Executive, she leverages over a decade of experience across various sectors to enhance her work in education, bolstered by her studies in education and multilingualism. Having not enjoyed school as a child and inspired by her two bilingual children, she is determined to make her lessons engaging and enjoyable for her students. She combines her diverse skills in didactics and project management to foster a rich educational landscape for young learners.
